It Would, Wouldn't It?
by blue-eyed-blonde12
Summary: Her warning was not unfounded, though the danger existed in a way that she didn't expect. Of course, this would only ever happen to him. -Abby/Hoagie friendship-


_Explanations can be found at the bottom. Good day!_

(Dedicated to _stoplight-melody_. And my little sister, whose scar was my biggest inspiration for this.)

* * *

"Spiderman never had these problems." He pouted as she swept his auburn hair away from the wound on his forehead. Abby chuckled, a deep, throaty laugh, and looked at him with an amused smile.

"Spiderman can sling webs to catch himself. You can't, Hoags."

He crossed his arms childishly and stuck his tongue out at her. She snickered again. He was hiding his embarrassment rather well at the moment, considering what had landed him in the hospital in the first place. Abby fought the urge to cringe and laugh at the same time.

_It had been only forty five minutes earlier; Abby had been walking home empty handed from a library study session, enjoying the sunshine and warmth with some exercise instead of with a car. Hearing an unnatural rustling of leaves above her, she glanced up to see Hoagie lounging on a low branch. He waved at her lazily._

_ "Heya Abs. What's up?"_

_ "You, apparently. What on earth ya doin'?"_

_ He shrugged. "Dunno." Scooting out farther on the tree, Hoagie swung until he faced her, albeit upside down. She was a little startled with his sudden closeness, but covered the surprise with disapproval as she watched his face slowly turn radish colored as blood rushed to his head._

_ "Get down, ya gonna hurt yaself." She chided, mentally berating herself for sounding so motherly._

_ He rolled his eyes. "Relax, I'm holding onto the branch." While it was true, he did have a sturdy grip around the tree limb, and his knees were firmly hooked around it, she knew he was being needlessly reckless._

_ "Abby don't care, she don't want ya ta crack ya head open. Down." He huffed and pulled himself upright on the branch again, then dropped so he was hanging right side up by his arms, the toes of his sneakers scraping the cracked sidewalk. Abby had stepped back so they didn't knock heads, but now she brushed by him, continuing her journey home. She heard him drop to the ground and follow her, shoes slapping the pavement, but didn't turn around to check._

_ A startled cry rang from behind her, followed by a muffled thump and a low groan. Abby turned on her heel to see Hoagie rolling over on the ground, fingers flying to his head to examine a jagged cut above his left eyebrow that was quickly oozing blood._

_ By his side in an instant, Abby fished a clean tissue from her pocket, folded it into quarters, and pressed it gently to the wound, slapping his hand away when he attempted to hold it himself and instantly feeling bad about it when she noted his scratched palms._

_ "What happened?"_

_ He blushed and sheepishly pointed at his untied sneakers. She snorted, exasperated and annoyed._

_ "Does ya mama teach ya anything?" she asked, rolling her eyes. "C'mon, Abby's gotta make sure ya didn't damage that noggin any worse than it was." Hoagie didn't look pleased with her comment, but obeyed silently as they finished the two block trek to her house and she pushed him into the passenger's seat of one of the Lincoln family's cars. Abby had him under strict orders not to put too much force on his head with the tissue, but also not to allow too little. It was a difficult balance and he had a few scoldings before he managed to keep the pressure at a constant._

The hospital staff had already examined Hoagie, declaring him fine other than the opening just above his eyebrow that measured just a little under two inches. It had already been cleaned and stitched. Now they were just waiting in the hospital room for the head doctor's O.K. to leave. Now that she was done worrying, the whole situation was rather funny.

"And you thought I was gonna get hurt from falling out of the tree." He almost raised an eyebrow, but thankfully refrained, as it might have popped one of the newly sewn stitches.

She blinked at him. "Abby didn't think even you knew how to trip on flat surfaces."

Hoagie grumbled something undecipherable, though it most certainly wasn't the friendliest thing he'd ever uttered, judging by his tone. The doorway was darkened momentarily as a tall and friendly man made his way into the room.

"Abigail!" Dr. Lincoln chided playfully, "You gotta keep a closer eye your friends, with the bumps and the scrapes and the cuts and-Oh, you know what I mean." She grinned at her father.

"A straightjacket wouldn't keep this boy from hurtin' himself, Daddy." Abby said, ruffling Hoagie's hair gently, so as to not cause more pain. The pilot frowned even more, embarrassed.

They got permission to leave, along with a peal of laughter from Dr. Lincoln when Hoagie refused to take a sticker when they were offered, claiming that they were too kiddy for him. Abby winked at her father and took two before following her cross friend down the hallway, calling after him that his shoes were untied, and giggling a bit when he immediately checked, stopping long enough for her to catch up.

Abby couldn't resist asking as she stepped into the revolving door alongside him, "And what has Hoagie learned?" He glared daggers at her, which did nothing whatsoever to the smile tugging at her lips or the clear twinkle of laughter sparking in her eyes.

"Trees are safe and walking is dangerous."

* * *

_And you all thought he was gonna fall on his head because he was upside down, didn't you?  
If you don't understand the Spiderman thing at the beginning, I guess he was sort of hoping for an upside down kiss, but also because Peter Parker hasn't nearly killed himself by stepping on his own shoelaces and even if he did, he'd be able to catch himself.  
I was gonna put in something about Hoagie saying that he's cooler than Peter Parker and Abby telling him that at least Peter got the girl, but I figured it didn't fit._

_Eh, it's garbage. But it was fun to write. HEY! Did you guys know that KND is back on the air?! What am I saying? Of course you did!_

_Love always,_

_Jess  
_


End file.
